BAAG's website
is best viewed using

Gardening Jokes!

If you have a gardening joke of your own and you would like to see it here on this page, send an email to maria@baag.com.au. If you also tell us your name and the school you go to we will make sure people know who's joke it is!

How can you tell which end of a worm is its head?

Tickle it in the middle and see which end laughs.

What did one plum say to the other plum?

I wish we hadn't got into this jam.

What pear can't you eat?

A pair of slippers.

Why are bananas never lonely?

Because they always hang around in bunches.

What is the fastest vegetable?

A runner bean.

What vegetables do plumbers fix?

Leeks.

How do you make a lemon drop?

Let go of it.

How do you know carrots are good for your eyes?

Have you ever seen a rabbit wearing glasses?

What's green and jumps about in the garden?

A spring onion.

What would you get if you crossed a garden sprinkler with a rabbit?

Hare spray.

What would you get if you crossed a kitten with a weeping tree?

A pussy willow.

What would you get if you crossed a pig with a cactus?

A porkerpine.

What would you get if you crossed a tyre with a cactus?

A puncture.

What would you get if you crossed a potato with an onion?

A spud with watery eyes.

What do trees and dogs have in common?

They both have bark.

What did the first caterpillar say to the second caterpillar when they saw a butterfly?

"You'll never get me up in one of those things!"